Safety Corner – Bullying my Son

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Question: Sir,I am the father of a 14year old from tvpm.My son is in 10th standard.We arranged him tutions at vanchiyoor.We got early morning classes as the evening batches are filled.Some weeks before he complained that some men are following him in the road from statue to GH junction telling him vulgar comments.First we didnt consider it as serious matter.But on his reapeated complaints and tantrums made me observe the situation and he was right.I complained to the concerned police station.Fo some days everything was normal.But now the things are repeating and my son doesn’t want to go alone.But its not possible for me to take him to class daily, as I work at ernakulam.How can we make him feel confident to face situations like this?

Dear Sir,

I need more details about your problem before I can give you an advice.

Some are:

Where is your House?Can your son take another route?Which Police Station did you Complain/ did you use the police helpline ‘100’ to ensure immediate response?What did the Police do in this regard?Why do you think they stopped harassing for some days?Do you know/ can you identify these men?Why do you think they are doing this?Is it a random bullying or is it for some purpose?

Now, in spite of these limitation I will try to answer your problem as a case of bullying.

Bullying is a common problem which young men like your son are facing these days.

Usually, bullying is a random act intended to be an ego trip for the miscreants. in such cases they are not particular about who the victim is so avoiding them usually solves the issue. Just ignore them/ avoid them/ take a different route/ use a different mode of transport/ travel in groups, etc. (of course you need to take your son into confidence when you ask him to avoid them by taking these measures. Ensure that he does not feel that he has been intimidated to do this. This will remain as a scar on his psyche and he may becomes incapable of dealing with challenges/ threats/problems in life. Ensure that he feels it is the intelligent thing to do and he is out smarting the miscreants when he is avoiding them.)But do keep a watch for any new developments and be ready to intervene if necessary.

Considering the miscreants are doing this purposefully, this need to be addressed with seriousness.You need to ensure that the Police acts on your complaint and investigate the causes and people behind such a harassment.Until a proper solution is arrived at by the Law enforcement agency, try to be with your son to support him. These are formative years of his life and even for his career. and if you must leave for your work place for some urgent matters or so, it is alright to ask him not to go for tuitions during those days. Better safe than sorry.

Also try to understand – Who they are, why they are doing this and what are their backgrounds etc. while you are at it. These information can even be very useful to the police also.

Other suggestions are:1. Teach your son Basic Self Defence. This will help him all his life. To live safely and be confident.2. If possible get a Spy Pen/Key chain/Button/Watch/or such device and record the actual incident.    ( if possible only- don’t take too much risk). This can be very useful as evidence and help you resolve the case fast.3. Comfort your child. Give him Confidence.

Hope this advise is useful in your problem. But if you need any more assistance do contact me at Email: [email protected]. or call our Security Helpline Number – 9744 22 9744.

regards,

Adv. Anu V. Nambalikkaran.Director,Rampart Services.
www.rampartservices.com.